A Stay Cool Mom

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

Have you ever been so frustrated with your kids that you totally lost your cool? Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs 31 Ministries. My kids would answer that question about me with a big ol’ yes.

It’s not that I want to lose my cool. It’s just that with five different kids all needing constant attention and correction my emotions can get pushed to the brink sometimes. So, I’ve been giving this a lot of thought and have discovered something. I have to think ahead about the consequences I’ll give when one of my kid’s acts defiant or disrespectful. I can take away a toy, an iPod, or the privilege of hanging out with friends. The point is to plan ahead for consequences that scream so I don’t have to.

For more ways to be a mom who keeps her cool by visiting Proverbs31 Ministries on-line. You’ll find daily messages and blogs written by women who know what you’re going through at Proverbs31.org.

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The Bathtub is Overflowing but I Feel Drained, by Lysa TerKeurst

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What’s Wrong with Me?

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Renee Swope

What's wrong with ME? Do you ever ask yourself that question? Hi I’m Renee Swope with Proverbs 31 Ministries.

Recently it dawned on me that every time I ask, "What's wrong with me?" I’m actually telling myself that something IS wrong with me. Then I try to figure out what my illusive fault is so I can fix it. But honestly, what I need to fix is the question I'm asking and the statement I'm making with those four powerful words.Why? Because every time I ask, "What's wrong with me?" I tell myself that something is wrong with me.

And if you’re doing it, too, let's make a pact to stop.

God doesn’t want us telling ourselves that something’s wrong with us. He created us. He wants us to focus our time and thoughts doing what we do best, instead of criticizing our flaws. None of us are perfect, but WE ARE "fearfully and wonderfully made" - just the way God planned. For more encouragement, log on to Proverbs 31.org.

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Believe the Best

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

Recently a friend said something that could have hurt my feelings. Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs 31 Ministries. I’d invited my friend over for dinner but she seemed hesitant about committing.

At first I was tempted to feel like she was wondering if a better offer might come along which hurt. But the reality is I know this friend loves me. I know she likes spending time with me. So, I made the choice to believe the best in her and let any hurt go.

A few days later, she confided in me that when I called she and her husband had been having an argument about her making plans without consulting him. I was so glad I’d made the choice to let go of my hurt feelings. How about you? Do you have a friend that you need to make the choice right now to believe the best about?

For more encouragement and insights on friendship, visit Proverbs 31 Ministries on-line. Just log on to Proverbs31.org.

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Encouragement for Today

P31 Woman Magazine

What If?

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Renee Swope

What if today when I spend time with God instead of focusing on all of my concerns, I decided to focus only on Him? Hi, I’m Renee Swope for Proverbs 31 Ministries.

Sometimes I feel like I hold a magnifying glass over my concerns and they get bigger and bigger, but what if I took the magnifying glass off my worries and struggles, and instead I completely focused on God's love, God's power, God's provision, God's strength and God's goodness. Imagine what life would be like if God became bigger than anything else. Instead of focusing on what I may think is wrong with me, I'd be consumed by all that is right with Him.

The Bible tells us to fix our eyes on Jesus – the author and perfecter of our faith. So today, let’s do it. Let’s stop thinking about us and start thinking more about HIM! I’ll bet our outlook will be completely transformed and our problems will shrink in comparison. For more encouragement, visit Proverbs31.org. and sign up for our free email devotions.

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My Goal as a Mom

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

This parenting thing can be so stinkin' hard. Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst for Proverbs 31 Ministries. There are no textbook answers. It's a moment by moment balancing act between loving, molding, modeling, loving some more, and figuring out how and when to discipline.

Only God can prepare me with the wisdom and discernment necessary for each and every parenting moment. So, through a lot of prayer and reading God’s parenting wisdom in the Bible, I have to stay close to Him- ask Him- rely on Him-cry out to Him- and make Him the basis for my parenting.

My goal should never be to raise kids that make me look good. Even though I want this sometimes! My goal should be to raise kids who love God and spend their lives making His goodness known in their corner of the world.

If you’ve been looking for encouragement along your parenting journey log on to Proverbs31.org.

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The Bathtub is Overflowing but I Feel Drained, by Lysa TerKeurst

To Complete or Compete?

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Renee Swope

Have you ever wondered why you’re the way you are, or why you do things the way you do? Hi I’m Renee Swope with Proverbs 31 Ministries. From the time I was in Jr. High, I didn't really like who I was. I compared myself to girls around me and tried to figure out who people liked most, so I could be like them. It was exhausting!Comparison is our worst enemy because it leaves us confused and discontent. My friend Genia summed it well one day while we were talking about comparison. She said, “When I compare myself with someone else, I can never measure up because I’m comparing my insides with their outsides.”

Comparison becomes a competition but no one wins! God never intended for women to compete with each other; He wants us to complete each other. We need to encourage each other’s strengths and be who God created us to be. For more encouragement on completing, not competing as women log on to Proverbs31.org and click on Everyday Life.

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Pinches and Grace

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

I wanted to pinch the two girls sitting in the front row at church. Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs31 Ministries. My daughter and her friend weren't acting the way I wanted them to.

Suddenly, an annoying little thought started to tug at the corners of my mind. "You want your children to act perfectly because it makes you look good. Let that go. They don't need to be sitting up straight to hear God's message. This is a beautiful time for grace."

Soon my daughter's friend looked back at me. Despite my feelings, I smiled, winked, and gave her a little wave.

Then that wiggly, usually not very affectionate, middle schooler got out of her seat. She walked down the aisle, five rows back, and gave me a hug that preached a thousand sermons right then and there.

Oh how crucial it is for me as a mom to ask God for moment by moment wisdom. For more mom encouragement, check out our daily blogs at Proverbs31.org.

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Green Pastures

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Susanne Scheppmann

I just love these words from the Bible: “He makes me lie down in green pastures.” Hi, I’m Renee Swope for Proverbs 31 Ministries. On days when I’m stressed, I think of this and imagine a peaceful green meadow beside a winding creek where there are no worries. Some friends were recently studying this verse when someone asked: “What is your green pasture?”

A woman who serves in ministry said, “Bubble baths and reading for hours!” Then another one who teaches high school said, “Crawling into bed at night – just knowing the day is over.”

I believe our green pastures vary with each season of life we’re in. But I love knowing God wants us to have times and places that restore our souls from the wear and tear of life.

So today, let’s look at the landscape of our lives for our own green pasture, then rush to the side of our Shepherd to find rest there. For more encouragement, visit Proverbs31.org.

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More Than Just a Clean Car

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

I try to keep my car clean, honestly… I do. Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs 31 Ministries. I keep the area where I sit very clean and tidy. It would never occur to me to use it as a trashcan. My kids on the other hand have issues.

Yesterday I informed the kids that I was tired of pulling through the car pool line at school and watching things fly about when they got out. After school my kids went to work cleaning. But when I inspected there was still trash everywhere.

They said, "Ohhhhh, we didn't know you meant the trash too. We just got our stuff out."

When they came inside I talked to them about the importance of doing things right the first time. I also explained that doing little things out of obedience is how God prepares us for the bigger things in life. I’m happy to report, my car is clean! At least for today that is.

For more Everyday Life Encouragement, visit Proverbs 31 Ministries and log on to Proverbs31.org.

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Staying On Track

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Jill Tracey

Recently a friend of mine got an email from a teenager who’s wiser than his years! Hi, I’m Renee Swope from Proverbs 31 Ministries. My friend works for a radio station and she got an email from a young guy who’s struggling in his relationship with Jesus. He said he hadn’t been reading his Bible, praying, or going to church and he really missed the closeness with God he felt when he was doing these things. Then he said, “It’s a lot harder to get back on track than it is to fall away.”

Isn’t that true? In a few words, he summed up a life truth that many adults struggle with. I’ve found that when things in my life require routines, it’s a lot harder to re-establish them once I’m off track. Good habits like reading the Bible, praying, and going to Church can easily fade away into the background of life. This teen challenged me to work harder to stay on track since it’s so much easier than getting back on! For more encouragement, visit Proverbs31.org.

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Understanding the Bible

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Jill Tracy

Sometimes I think it’d be easier to learn Chinese than to completely understand the Bible! Hi, I’m Lysa TerKeurst for Proverbs 31 Ministries. I’ve been reading the Bible in two translations- one that’s more traditional and one that’s written in more of an everyday language. But, no matter how simple the language, there are still some things that happened and some concepts that I struggle to understand. A friend told me that even though she had formal training in the Bible it’s hard for her too. So, when it comes to reading AND understanding the Bible, what do we do? There are books and commentaries that can help. But, I’ve found that asking God’s Spirit to help me understand what I’m reading is crucial! The Bible itself says if we lack wisdom, or understanding, we should ask God for help. So, I’m doing a LOT of asking and starting to gain a little more understanding! For more encouragement log on to Proverbs31.org.

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Letting Kids be Kids

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Jill Tracey

Isn’t it easy to get embarrassed when our kids act like…kids?! Hi, I’m Renee Swope with Proverbs 31 Ministries. A friend of mine went out to eat recently with her two-year-old daughter and some friends who also had a two-year-old. The little ones really enjoyed sitting next to each other, so much so that at one point they were squealing with laughter and almost screaming with delight.

My friend enjoyed the kids’ interaction. But as they got louder, she wanted to shush them. Then she remembered it was a family restaurant. They’d expect families to be here and kids to be a little noisy? And, by the looks on everyone’s faces they were enjoying the kids.

It’s hard to know when to let our kids be kids. There’s a fine line between having fun and disrupting others. That day my friend decided to err on the side of fun as often as she can. For more parenting encouragement, visit Proverbs31.org.

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No More Silent Treatments

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

Recently my husband hurt my feelings so I resorted to the ever so mature silent treatment. Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst for Proverbs 31 Ministries. Can you relate? Well, I was so upset that I called a friend who I was sure would understand and say something to make me feel better. But what she said actually pierced my heart and helped to change my perspective. She asked me, “Lysa, if you knew something might happen to Art today and he’d never come home again, would this situation really matter?” Suddenly, my hurt was put into perspective and my outlook was completely different. Instead of the silent treatment I called my husband and gently told him why his statement had hurt my feelings. The anger and hurt had dissipated and, thanks to my wise friend, I was free to live the rest of that day with no regrets.

For more marriage tips, visit Proverbs 31 Ministries and click on Everyday Life at Proverbs31.org.

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Marriage Secret Revealed

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Paula Friedrichsen with Renee Swope

I wonder if there’s a secret to having a happy marriage. Hi, I’m Renee Swope for Proverbs 31 Ministries. If there were such a secret, I bet it would be overlooking our spouse’s faults, you know, those annoying personality quirks that were humorous when we first met.
Marriage can be challenging at times - but it can also be fulfilling, comforting, and fun. I’ve discovered that if I really want to enjoy my marriage, I have to keep my sense of humor and stay focused on my husband’s good qualities.

In her book, The Man You Always Wanted is the One You Already Have, Paula Friedrichsen says that, “Overlooking our husband’s faults means to ‘look over the top’ of them to see the person we love standing on the other side.”

So, whether my husband leaves his shirts and socks on the floor or keeps me awake with his snoring… I want to overlook his faults. And, hopefully he’ll do the same for me!

For more marriage encouragement, click on Everyday Life at Proverbs31.org.

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Clean as You Go

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

The other day I came home from a fun outing with my kids and realized how messy the house was! Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs 31 Ministries.

Quickly my mood went from happy, happy to mad and demanding. My husband pulled me aside after watching me rant and rave for a few minutes and asked a very simple question: “Why did you let everyone go on a fun outing without first having them clean up? If you’d told them before you left what needed to be done the thrill of going out would have motivated everyone and you could have come home relaxed.”

He was right.

I’ve taken his advice on several occasions and it’s amazing how it has reduced my stress. And what if the kids don’t cooperate with the clean before we go plan? Well, then we cancel the outing and I get to take a bubble bath. Now that’s a beautiful plan!

For more encouragement as a mom, log on to Proverbs31.org.

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Treasures

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writers: Tracie Miles and Renee Swope

When my son got home from his grandma’s the other day he was so excited! He’d been entrusted with a special treasure! Hi, I’m Renee Swope for Proverbs 31 Ministries. My mom had given Andrew a crystal pitcher that had belonged to his great grandmother. We talked about why it was a special treasure and how he needed to take good care of it.

It dawned on me that this was a great time to tell Andrew how God says our most valuable treasures are in heaven. I explained that we gain treasures for ourselves in Heaven by doing things that reflect what God treasures most.

Andrew was excited to know that he had treasures in heaven, and he wanted to know how to get more! I told him that the Bible says when we serve and love others - the way Jesus does - God stores those acts of kindness as treasures for us. For more encouragement, click on today’s radio transcript at Proverbs31.org.

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Losing Stuff

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

Recently my husband and I returned home from vacation only to discover that our camera was missing. Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs 31 Ministries. And I have to admit I cried. Not so much over the lost camera as over the lost pictures. I know it sounds silly but I was so sad I prayed that God would either help us find the camera or give me a peace about this loss. Later that day, I wrote down what I felt I needed to remember:

First, keep it in perspective.

And, secondly, don’t let this loss take the joy out of the memories of our trip.

Ultimately, the camera and the photos are just stuff. Many people are dealing with situations today that are far beyond this. So, I’m thankful for the memories, hopeful for the return of the camera, but OK if we never get it back.

For more daily life perspectives, log on to Proverbs 31 Ministries and click on Everyday Life at Proverbs31.org.

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Take Out the Trash

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Paula Friedrichsen

Sometimes unforgiveness can be a lot like smelly trash! Hi, I’m Renee Swope for Proverbs 31 Ministries.

When an overripe cantaloupe sits around rotting in the bottom of the kitchen trashcan, it starts to stink. Add yesterday’s leftovers and it gets even worse! We wonder, “Won’t someone PLEASE take out the trash?”

You know, unforgiveness in our hearts is a lot like smelly garbage and it can stink up our marriage. Sometimes I keep a running tally of each and every offense, which makes make my heart quickly wreak of unforgiveness.

I’ve found the only way to “take out the trash” in my marriage is to bring my frustrations to God, ask for His perspective of my husband, and “choose” to search for the good in him.

We’ve all found it difficult to forgive in the past—but here’s the good news; today can be a brand new beginning! For more marriage encouragement click on everyday life at Proverbs31.org.

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All for God

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

What if I chose today to live in a way that’s completely pleasing to God? Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs 31 Ministries.

You know, God’s never asked me to do great things. All He’s ever asked of me is to allow His greatness to enter me, change things around in me, and be seen through me. So, today I’m making the choice to not settle for “good enough” I won’t let the influences of pride, what’s easiest for me, and what I want overshadow my desire to live for God. Today, I will choose to put others ahead of myself, to resist the temptation to gossip or displease God in any way, and to give everything in my heart to Him.

There are no great people who serve God. Just simple people who every now and then make great choices.

For more encouragement in your relationship with God log on to Proverbs31.org.

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Lean on Me

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Renee Swope

My family was snow skiing when we ended up on a slope that was way bigger than we expected. Hi, I’m Renee Swope for Proverbs 31 Ministries.

My son Andrew kept falling and getting hurt. So, I decided to "ski" him down. He stood in front of me with his skis in between mine and wrapped his arms around my elbows. It was crazy, I know! And believe me, we almost died a few times. Seriously, I was screaming, "JESUS help us". And, HE did!

We made it to the bottom, I told Andrew I was proud of him for staying focused and keeping his skis straight so we could make it down. Then he said, "Mom, you did all the work. I just had to lean on you."

It made me think about how God does all the work if we'll stay centered in Him, lean on His strength and let Him guide us along life's path. For more encouragement, visit Proverbs31.org.

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Does Jesus Work?

Hostess: Lysa TerKeurst
Contributing Writer: Lysa TerKeurst

Can a regular person like me answer the profound question the world is asking? Hi I’m Lysa TerKeurst with Proverbs 31 Ministries. Today’s society is asking…Does Jesus work?

Well, I’m just a country girl with a husband and 5 kids. I’m not a theologian and I don’t have a PhD. I’m just a woman who dared to utter one little word that shifted my heart and set my soul on the adventure I was designed to live. I simply said “Yes” to Jesus. All I have to show the world that Jesus works is my one little "yes" and a story of what happened when an ordinary woman dared to utter it. And it has been enough.

It’s enough for all of us. The only thing we need in order to share Jesus with others is the reality of what He’s done in our lives. The more we learn to live like Him, the more the world will see Him and know that Jesus ABSOLUTELY works!

For more encouragement log on to Proverbs31.org.

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The Gift of Listening

Hostess: Renee Swope
Contributing Writer: Renee Swope

The other night my husband was calling our 13-year-old dachshund to come get a treat, but she wasn’t budging. Hi, I’m Renee Swope for Proverbs 31 Ministries. We joked about Chelsea having “selective hearing” - since it was her bedtime - or perhaps she's going deaf.

My son Andrew looked at me with concerned on his face and said, “Mom, I hope you don’t go deaf like Chelsea when you get old.” I laughingly asked why.

"Cause sometimes you don’t hear me now. Like when you're on the computer and I ask you a question; you don’t hear me.” Ouch, I wasn’t expecting that answer! But instead of drowning myself in guilt, I pulled him close and apologized. I told him from now on I am going to stop what I’m doing and really listen when he talks to me.

Listening is a gift we can give to those we love. It doesn’t cost much. And we give it every time we stop what we’re doing and turn our full attention to them. For more encouragement, visit Proverbs31.org.

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